Challenge, Encouragement, Healing

How to Ruin a Relationship

Everyday people ruin good relationships by trying to collect a debt. Someone hurts us and we long for justice. We are looking for a payback, but we’re attempting to collect on a debt that is not ours to collect on. It is clearly human nature to desire a wrong be made into a right and that we be seen as the one in the right.

Who can pay you back for the wrong done to you over the course of your life? Can your parents? Can your spouse? Can your co-worker? It is not always possible and most times you will be disappointed or let down. Eventually a relationship is ruined by our expectation.

But what if we handed the injustice over to God? What if we prayed and said, “I choose to not become bitter or strive for justice, but rather I lay the injustice at Your feet and ask You to settle the matter.” And then, in leaving it with God, we let the person off the hook.

If we’re truly humble and allow God to settle the matter, our imagination can stop running wild with thoughts of retribution. We can tell ourself there is no need of payback. Further, we can choose for this relationship to remain intact and stop expecting what we perceive to be a wrong turned into a right by our personal effort.

And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.” (Matthew 6:12)

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