The next ten weeks will include a series on our evaluation of marriage after 37 years of saying, “I still do.”   This is not simply reflection, but key ingredients that we feel are non-negotiable for the most amazing future.  While they are simple and not new revelation, the question will continually be, “Are we walking in them?”

Number One: Put God First

Jesus in Matthew 22: 36-39 told us to love God first and then love our neighbor as ourselves.  How do we love a neighbor, a spouse, a child or a friend without first knowing and receiving God’s love for ourselves?  When we know His love, He becomes our identity, our esteem, then and only then can we love others as we love ourselves.  Domestic violence is the number one crime against the family today.  How can one who has vowed to love as Christ loves His church possibly hit, harm or abuse their spouse in any way?  The answer is through self-hate.  Jail cells are full of self-haters and marriages are inundated with those who cannot love their spouse because they do not know and have not received a revelation of God’s love for themselves.

Before loving your spouse, before loving your children, your ministry and your job we need to love God and make Him Lord of our lives.  Marriage issues are individual issues.  As we love God first and allow Him to provide ongoing healing in our lives, we will at the same time discover ongoing healing in our marriage.  This relationship with God being our number one priority makes Him the bonding agent to your relationship.  Men, if you seriously desire to walk in this truth, your wife will become more secure, more trusting and more joyful with you as her leader.  Ladies, if you place God first, your husband will become more attracted, more understanding, more content and more open to you and to your wisdom.