Marriage is not Christian, per se; it is a creation act of God.  Marriage was His idea from the beginning, as the cultures and religions of the world marry.  But the evil one has provided numerous counterfeits for marriage, e.g., cohabitation, numerous ongoing sexual partners, dating with an ongoing emphasis of breaking up and hurting others.  Keep in mind, there can only be a counterfeit if there is a real. You and I were created for a very real relationship with God and others and yet it seems to be relationships that we struggle with the most.  

Ninety three percent of Americans rate having a happy marriage as one of the most important objectives in life.  In 1992, the number one aspiration of high schoolers was having a good marriage and family life.  College students today are desperate to have only one marriage.  Over 70% of adult Americans believe that marriage is a lifelong commitment that should not be ended unless under extreme circumstances.  Get this: 85% of divorced and separated persons still believe that marriage is for life.  

Then why is cohabitation so prevalent today?  There is no legal or social pressure today against cohabitation.  The latest census figures show four million couples (men and women and not same-sex couples) are living together.  That is 8 times as many couples as in 1970.  The slide started with less moral prohibition against premarital sex in our culture, which opened the door to living together unmarried.  The more culture practices the abnormal, the more normal it becomes, e.g., abortion, divorce, cohabitation, etc. Cohabitation is popular with the loss of the negative stigma, the lack of commitment, the lack of well-defined responsibilities and authority and it provides the idea of an easy exit when it does not work out.

But the human heart craves security, commitment and a marriage enforced by love and the law, as well as social custom.  We want and need love and a vow spoken to commitment is the strongest contract we have…called a covenant in the scriptures.  Covenant is stronger than contract.  Contracts are written to be broken.  Covenant, if broken under Old Testament law, was certain death.  Marriage is not the end of freedom; it is the beginning of freedom to join our hearts and sprits together to fulfill God’s mission together in becoming one.  It is not about loss of freedom in any form, but about gaining a partner to support and be supported, to trust and be trusted, to provoke to growth and to give life to family.

Marriage changes life, behavior, social standing, expectations, relationships, and even tax forms.  It is making decisions jointly and growing as a long-term team.  Marriage is like long-term care insurance.  It promises to remain strong in sickness and in health.  It is a partnership to protect, to share equally, to serve, to provide for the needs of one another without selfish demand.  

(Thanks to the book, A Case for Marriage, by Linda Waite; Maggie Gallagher for the above statistics.)