The only noise in the room is the quiet hum of the oxygen machine. Holding her hand, I receive a semi-opened eye of pure love. She says a word or two occasionally. The best of late were, “I love you” and “goodbye.” 

My mother is 96 years old and has been the Eveready Bunny most of my life. She could work circles around anyone. Lying in a bed in a hospice unit must be extremely difficult and tormenting to her normally active self. And for the number of years under her belt, she can recall most anything. Her mind has stayed uncannily sharp.

Even while in assisted living, a place my wife and I jokingly refer to as “unassisted living,” she caught five med errors. That’s something to boast about at her age!

With my father preceding her to heaven, one feels the oncoming loss of both parents. But these last days are not about me as a son; they’re about caring for a mother who loved me, fought for me, and lovingly raised me. She was protective, but not overly protective. She corrected me but never overcorrected. Most times, as a misbehaving son I could make her laugh and then she’d forget about why she was disciplining me. I’d quickly be off the hook.

Laughing came easy to her, but she did not tolerate what she called “stupid humor.” The movie Elf was in that category for her. One of her nurses also falls within that category and she just rolls her eyes at her. Honestly, I’d have to agree with her on that one. 

Last night we prayed and I released my mother to her heavenly home. It was sweet, but without response from her. I know she agreed. Billy Graham once said there are two days in a person’s life that they do not control–the day they are born and the day they die. Everything in between is a choice. My mother made good choices during those in-between years. 

How does one say goodbye? When the one passing is a lover of Jesus you do not; you say, “See you later.” It is that hope we hold as Christians. The reason? Jesus did not stay in the grave. After the third day He arose from that tomb the enemy thought would hold Him, while the Romans believing no one could roll a huge stone away. He gloriously became the resurrection and the life.

I love how Matthew describes the scene at the tomb Sunday morning. He writes, “The angel went to the tomb and rolled the stone away from the entrance. Then he sat on top of the stone.” (28:2-5) That was one tough and totally cool angel! He sat on top of the stone waiting for the first arrivals to the empty grave.

End of life with our parents is not an easy time, but it can be a good time when our relationship is whole and full of love. If you’re out of relationship with a loved one, do all you know to do to make it right, forgive, and humble yourself. You only get one set of parents in this life and none of them are perfect, not even you. 

My mother is still with us this Easter, but unfortunately, she won’t be able to join the rest of us around our celebration table. We’ll miss her at the meal, but then we’ll gather around her bed celebrating her life until she enters her eternal home.  Meanwhile, she is holding onto a soft bear companion that my granddaughter is sharing with her.

I love you, Mom! One of these days we’ll be saying, “See you later” and it will be okay.