Category Archives: Encouragement

Encouragement, Leadership, Small Groups

Failure, the Pathway to Success

Thomas Watson, the founder of IBM once said, “The way to succeed is to double your failure rate.”  It is said that Thomas Edison worked on 10,000 different experiments to find the right filament for the light bulb.  He started in early 1878 and on October 21, 1879, almost two years later the first incandescent light bulb was born.  Edison understood that failure was the pathway to success. Edison believed that he needed to discover what did not work in order to get closer to what did work.  His theory believed in failure as a part of the process to success. For some reason we tend to see failure as a failing – I do not believe we should – mainly because I do not believe God does.  (Why do I believe this?  Because nowhere in His word did He hide the failures of His children.)

I like what Winston Churchill once said, “Success is going from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.”  And Solomon said it this way, “…for though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again.”  (Proverbs 24:16a)  How does this apply to you and me as leaders today?  We can project ourselves as a leader, one who is the ideal.  Without always realizing it, we can become polished versions of the super Christian, the super pastor, or the super marketplace leader.  We then need to project always being happy, always being well-adjusted, always being in faith, always overcoming every temptation or failure.  We must feverishly protect our fragile esteem and our image of leader at all cost.  Whether trying it or not, owning up to it or not we are saying, “be perfect like me, have my faith – and if I am doing it, certainly I can expect you to.”  Take a deep breath and enjoy today along with the mistakes made by yourself and those around you.  Allow them to be lessons learned toward success.

 

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Children, Encouragement

My Heavenly Father is a Gift Giver

It can be overwhelming for me to stop and consider the gifts my heavenly Father has bestowed upon me.  First and foremost there is the gift of my salvation.  Of course the gift of Holy Spirit living within me.  He has generously given me a wonderful and godly wife of almost 39 years.  I have three amazing children who have all gone to college and are now happily married living responsively on their own.  I have had the privilege of working for over 27 years in a ministry I love.  He has given me a home with many possessions.  To top it off, I am now a grandfather.   I am blessed with great health and wealth!

 

stock-vector-vector-set-of-hands-clients-purchasing-work-in-flat-retro-style.html.jpg  Those blessings toward me from heaven have caused me to be a giver.  I love giving gifts.  I usually give Mary gifts before it’s Valentines Day or even Christmas.  I anticipate and can’t wait to see her face when she is surprised with the new flowers on the dining room table.  I just can’t  seem to wait until the proper day to give.  I love giving gifts to my children.  One day we were enjoying a meal together with my adult children on our deck and I handed each of them some money just to bless them – no other reason.  My oldest son asked, “Who died” and provoked a bit of laughter.  When my children were teenagers, I would locate their wallets at random times and place a $20.00 bill in them.  Why?  My heavenly Father is an extravagant giver and I have come to believe that a sign of Christ-centered maturity is found in our ability to be generous.  The scripture states that as we water others we ourselves will be watered.  Has there been any dryness in your life lately? 

 

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Encouragement, Leadership, Marriage, Singles

Doing a One Eighty at Thirty Seven Thousand Feet

Last week I was in the middle of flying out of the country to spend time with several churches that I have the privilege of serving.  We were at 37,000 feet over the Atlantic and almost half way to our destination, having left Charlotte, NC two hours earlier, when the pilot came on the intercom and announced that we would be returning to the states – Miami, in fact.  None of the passengers, including myself, had realized that the plane had already completed its 180-degree turn around and was headed northwest rather than southeast.  This huge plane, a Boeing 757, with every available seat filled to capacity with mostly tourists completely changed directions and no one knew any different.

I got to thinking about that…  Could we be experiencing a 180-degree turn in our marriage and never have a clue?  Could we as believers experience a 180-degree turn in our devotional life or even our faith and not realize it?  Could our nation be experiencing a 180-degree turn away from a biblical truth and we do not know the Word of God well enough to realize what’s happening right before our eyes?  The scriptures tell us that the enemy of our souls…”masquerades as an angel of light.”  He can make something look good or enticing when in fact it is 180 degrees the opposite of the will of God.  Are you headed in the godly direction that you thought you were in every area of life?  “Lord, reveal to each of us the direction of our heart and soul.”

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Encouragement, Marriage, Postmarital, Prayer

Steps to Taking Your Marriage on an Annual Marriage Evaluation and Vision Retreat

You have most likely attended a woman’s retreat or a men’s retreat in your lifetime.  Have you and your spouse considered a personal marriage retreat for the purpose of evaluating the past year and then praying about vision for the forthcoming year?  My wife and I have been doing this for many years and find it to be one of the most helpful annual connections we do together.  It gets us on the same page.  We communicate thoroughly.  We take a hard look at what was and evaluate where we are.  We keep the excitement factor up by looking ahead toward the future.  In the next several weeks, we desire to share with you our process of how we do this.

I book a hotel room for 24 hours.  Yes, we get away from the normal setting because it’s conducive to what we desire to accomplish without the typical interruptions.   We check in as early as we can and begin to settle into evaluating our year after we dedicate our time to the Lord in prayer.  The first thing we do is to connect through prayer.  (We will look at other areas of this time in the coming weeks.)

Praying together as a couple is a key to this time.

Start by giving thanks for God’s provision and protection from this past year.

Pray about this time together concerning this retreat, specifically that you will hear the voice of your heavenly Father.

Pray over your marriage, your family, your employment, your finances; pray about everything and anything.

Give God praise for the positive and the not so positive.  Praise is a key factor to keep our heart attitude correct and open to this time.

Assess your prayer lives together as a couple and as a family.  Are we connecting sufficiently through the discipline of prayer as a couple?

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Encouragement, Prayer

Are You Overconfident in Your “Sinlessness?” III

For over 15 years I worked in the area of marriage and family counseling.  I loved the willingness of the counselee’s to receive God’s principles of relationship in marriage and in family, which would frequently extend to work, local church, etc.  Often the issue was history or a fear of the future.  During that time, I came across some powerful written prayers and recently found myself praying through them once again.  Below are just two paragraphs of those prayers, consider making these words your prayer as we each deal with our own confession of sinfulness.

Dear Heavenly Father, I acknowledge that there is only one true and living God, who exists as the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit.  I recognize Christ Jesus as the Son of the Living God, the Word that became flesh and dwelt among us.  Jesus, You are worthy to receive glory and honor and power, for You have created all things and in You, all things have their being.  Father God, You have proven Your love for me, because when I was still in sin and rebellion, Your Son, died for me.  Jesus, You forgave me all my sins and redeemed me from the kingdom of darkness.  All charges that were against me have been nailed to the cross and cancelled; therefore, the devil has nothing with which to accuse me.  I can do nothing apart from You, Jesus, and I declare my dependence on You.

 Father, I choose to give up all attempts to run my own life, putting no confidence in my flesh and I now submit to You.  I trust myself to Your care, as much as I can at this time.  Holy Spirit please reveal to me every area of my life that has been given over to the enemy.  I chose to crucify my flesh and walk by Your guidance, Holy Spirit, not giving in to the desires of my flesh.  I will present my body as an instrument of righteousness, a living and holy sacrifice, which is my spiritual duty.  I choose to humble myself and ask You to guide me to all truth and empower me to live above sin, in Jesus’ name.  Amen.

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Encouragement

Are You Overconfident in Your “Sinlessness?” II

Recently I have been finishing up reading through the New Testament.  It was actually the book of First John that provoked the topic of “sinlessness” in my life and for this blog.  John, in the first chapter writes, “If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.”  I just sat there thinking, “Am I deceiving myself in any way?”  And then I wondered just how much personal soul/heart searching am I actively involved in?  Verse ten then adds, “If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives.”  That’s a scary thought…

I know theologically my sins were forgiven on the cross over 2000 years ago: past, present and future.  It is by the grace of our Lord that we now walk in forgiveness.  That grace, however, does not grant me permission to freely sin.  But, I also know my potential.  I am imperfect.  I am in the world.  I am saved by grace.  These are important things to be reminded of, i.e., our humanness.  Thanks be to God I John also tells us this truth:  We know that anyone born of God does not continue to sin, the one who was born of God keeps him safe, and the evil one cannot harm him.  We know that we are children of God, and that the whole world is under the control of the evil one.  We know also that the Son of God has come and has given us understanding, so that we may know him who is true.  And we are in him who is true – even in his Son Jesus Christ. 

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Encouragement

Are You Overconfident in Your “Sinlessness?”

Have you robbed a bank or committed adultery lately?  Have you committed murder or been arrested for a DUI?  Do you lie to your boss about the hours you work or help yourself to the petty cash kept on hand?  These are all examples of “big” or obvious sins and when you and I walk through life for a long time not committing any of these acts but reading about others who do, we can become numb to our own sinfulness.  I know I can.  We might even be lulled into thinking we’re actually a pretty good, sin-free believer.

But wait just a minute.  Has everything you’ve said recently been 100% the truth without minimizing or exaggeration?  Have you stolen from your employer by checking your Facebook account three or four times a day?  Did you correct the store clerk when he made a mistake in your favor?  Have you thought any thoughts today that are less than honorable?  Sin is falling short of God’s ideal and desire for us and unless we actually catch that shortcoming and repent of our wrongdoing we are overconfident in ourself.  Remember that overconfident disciple who said he would never deny his Lord and a few short hours later claimed to not even know Him?  Jesus gave His life for the obvious and the not so obvious sin.  “Lord, help us to see both and respond to You quickly.”

The word of God is living and active.  Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing souls and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.  (Hebrews 4: 12, 16)  Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other… (James 5:16)

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Encouragement, Leadership

Finishing the Year with Vision for 2014

The year 2013 is about to come to a close.  What were your highlights from this past year?  Do they out number the lows?  It’s easy to be thankful for the highlights, but a bit tougher to “give thanks in all things” for the lows.  Someone said if you get your eyes on what you feel God hasn’t done, you’ll lose your thankfulness, but if you keep your eyes and heart on what God has done you’ll maintain a heart of praise and a spirit of joy.

Before we enter 2014, I want to encourage you to take some time to evaluate 2013 and consider what you have learned, how you have grown as a person, what did you needlessly worry about, what financial decisions were right and which ones were wrong, how did you do with dating your spouse and children, and perhaps consider what you would have done differently now that you have the hindsight?  Then turn the corner and ask God for the vision He has for you in 2014.  What three or four goals would you like to see accomplished spiritually, emotionally, educationally, financially and physically?  Consider writing down the vision along with steps to take in order to reach your vision.  When you come to the end of 2014, you’ll have more to rejoice about as you discover many of the goals written twelve months earlier are accomplished.

Write down the vision and make it plain on tablets…  (Habakkuk 2:2)

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Encouragement, Prayer

Ending the Year With Forgiveness

Throughout 2013 you and I experienced perhaps numerous disappointments, letdown and unmet expectations.  We had opportunity to respond in anger, pick up an offense, grow cold toward someone or simply pretend it never happened.  How we responded or reacted was up to us.  In thinking back over the year 2013, I had one of the most personally challenging and difficult life situations.  Some days I felt freedom and many other days I felt defeated, unable to change the situation.  I know it affected me emotionally and it affected my thinking.  While I guess I’ve had a lifetime to prepare for such situations, I found myself very unprepared and trying to find some sanity in it all.  I forced myself to spend more time in God’s word and in prayer looking for answers (the opposite of what my flesh wanted to do).

After months of this turmoil, I read two verses of scripture that helped me immensely.  Of course I’ve read them many times before, but for that morning they were brand new once again – written just for my specific situation.  Colossians 3:13 & 14 state, “Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.  And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”  The lesson?  As we look back over 2013 there is so much to be thankful for and there is so much to forgive yourself and others for.  Do not carry un-forgiveness, anger, offenses or a cold heart into 2014.  It will only hurt you.

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Encouragement, Prayer

Jesus is the Best at Everything

This past summer I was talking to a friend in New Zealand and he had an apartment to sell in Auckland.  Another friend was telling me of an upside down house investment he had and needed to sell the home as soon as possible.  While in Barbados this year, a businessman told me he had to sell a 37-foot fishing boat.  Someone else had shared with me about a legal issue they were in the middle of.   Still another told me about a need to purchase a home.  One young man was sharing about his need and desire for a wife and ministry partner.  As well, a young married woman was sharing with me about her need for marriage counseling.

My answer was similar in each and every situation.  Jesus is the best banker, the best real estate agent, the best salesperson, an amazing lawyer, a matchmaker since Genesis two and one of His names is The Counselor.  Christian Mingle or Match.com cannot possibly do what Jesus does in finding a life mate even though one in five singles are now finding relationships on-line.  His bank will never run dry of funds.  He owns the cattle on a thousands hills.   And, speaking of real estate, He owns it all!  His law degree is not from Harvard, but He created law and government.  Jesus is not only the Christ child, the Son of Man and Savior, He IS the answer.  Check out James chapter four, verse two.

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