Category Archives: Leadership

Encouragement, Leadership, Small Groups

A Thirty Six Year Old Prophetic Word

images-3It was May 6, 1979 and I was 25 years old. A young man (who did not know me) left his drum set from the front of the auditorium – mid worship set – and headed to the back of the room where I was standing. He wiggled his way through the pew and came nose to nose to me, a visitor. He then began to speak in King James language, …”For yea I shall stir thee and move thee out. Yea a gift shall come upon thee. Thou shalt exhort with the word and bring forth a rich blessing to my people that thou knew not of. Yea I shall return unto thee a hundred fold, saith the Lord.” There were words before and more after these few statements, but in re-reading them the other day, while on a two-day prayer retreat, I was struck by the boldness and obedience of this young man and by the ways in which this “word” has come to pass.images-5

I loved God with all of my heart, but those words were a huge stretch for me at the time they were spoken. Only God could speak something so truth-filled and yet so far from the days of fulfillment. How could I possibly comprehend that one day I would have the opportunity to travel around the world depositing the “gift” of God’s word through teaching. And, amazingly, some of those words would turn into books.

imagesGive your life fully to God today so that He can grow you and use you to create a different world tomorrow. No one person can affect everyone, but each of us can do our part and reach the world with the truth of the gospel one by one.

 

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Leadership, Marriage, Postmarital, Premarital

Pornography and Pursuing Sexual Wholeness in Your Marriage (part I)

imagesA nationally conducted survey among churches over the past five years revealed that 68% of men and 50% of pastors view pornography regularly (Pure Desire Ministries, 2009). But, the most shocking was that 11-17 year old boys reported being the greatest users. Pornography in our country is a 4 billion dollar industry. More money is spent on pornography than pro baseball, pro basketball, pro football and the Super bowl combined per year. Eleven thousand adult films are produced per year, which is 20 times the number of regular media films coming out of Hollywood. The issue is sweeping through the church and with the present younger generation being exposed and involved, it is epidemic.

As the church today, we tell men and women caught up in this issue that it is solely a moral issue, but studies are showing that it is also a brain issue. So telling men and women to study more, pray more and simply to think pure thoughts is like telling a heroin addict to just stop thinking about and pursuing his drug.  Studies are now indicating that when we are involved in sexual activity the brain releases a chemical called Oxytocin, along with other chemicals, it is the glue to human bonding.  When we watch pornography, powerful neurotransmitters such as dopamine are also released and our brain then takes those images and creates a bond, actually interfering with human bonding and sexuality. Dr. Tim Jennings, a neuropsychologist says that any type of repetitive behavior will create trails in our brain that fire on automatic sequence. So men and women who truly love Jesus with all of their heart can be in sexual bondage from the enemy due to viewing pornography repeatedly.images-3

Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed. As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do… I Peter 1:13-15

God desires us to bond with our life mate sexually while the enemy desires us to be in bondage to sexually explicit material.  We will continue with this subject in future blogs.

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Leadership

Leadership is Influence

images-4Someone once said that leadership is influence – no more, no less. However, leadership and management are not one in the same.  A managers role is to manage, but leaders influence toward change.  Are you doing more management today or more changing of those you influence?  John Maxwell calls it “The law of influence.”   That said, a major issue for nonprofit leaders is that we typically work with volunteers and not paid employees.  Paid employees are leveraged by their income to do what their leader says to do or their job is at stake.  Most local church leaders do not have that ingredient of leverage, only their influence via their relationships.  Volunteers are not forced to follow the vision, they choose to and so much of that choice is connected to their belief in their leaders.  Leadership in a not-for-profit can become more challenging than leadership within the marketplace for these very reasons.

The other day I was asking myself (thinking about), How much leadership (influence) do I have with those whom I serve through leading? It’s a good question because I do not desire to simply manage, I desire to also coach toward change.  Author and pastor Andy Stanley says most parents do their parenting by reward and reprimand, but should actually be coaching their children.  I appreciate this thought in reference to leadership and spiritual parenting.  If spiritual parenting were simply reward when you do well and chastisement when you do poorly, how are you training or leading toward change?  But, if through the process we sit down with those we lead, connecting through our relationship, we can begin to speak into their lives with the appropriate questions, observations, wisdom and prayerful insights.  Again, relationship is the key because there is not an exchange of goods or finances for services. Maybe you know the old leadership proverb: “He who thinks he leads, but has not followers, is only taking a walk.”  So, “Work hard and become a leader…”  Proverbs 12:24

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Encouragement, Leadership, Prayer, Training

The Value of a Sabbatical

images-3Taking a sabbatical is not a new concept. The word Sabbath taken from the Old Testament of the Bible simply means rest. It seems that God understood the concept of cessation and not just for man, but He also included the fields and the animals. (See Leviticus 25:3-4 and Exodus 23:12) Rest is something we are all familiar with, but an extended period of rest (beyond the typical one week to ten-day vacation) to most is thought to be somewhat unreasonable. Cindy Kirschner Goodman in her McClatchy Tribune article on sabbaticals said that, “Among the Fortune 100 Best Places to Work, 22 companies boast of offering fully paid sabbaticals.” She went on to write, “Companies find if they don’t do something, their workers will burn out and leave, or worse burn out and stay.”

Charles Spurgeon once said, “Rest time is not waste time. It is economy to gather fresh strength… It is wisdom to take occasional furlough. In the long run, we shall do more by sometimes doing less.” In my lifetime I have had the privilege of experiencing three sabbatical periods. Each one was unique within itself, but without fail God spoke to me significantly. There is something about detaching and refocusing that allows one to be sharper in the spirit and allows for growth. Perhaps the secret is that a sabbatical is not an extended vacation or a time to pursue a degree, but it is a time set aside for prayer, reflection, listening, and counsel for a healthier future. On that note, I just finished a book titled, The Value of a Sabbatical, Refocusing Your Life for a Healthy Future and I am totally excited about helping others through God’s concept of a Sabbath rest.

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Encouragement, Leadership, Prayer

Listening to God, What’s the Potential?

images-11George Washington Carver was born in 1864, the son of illiterate slaves who were owned by a white couple with the surname of Carver. Because of his “Aunt Susan,” Mrs. Carver, he went to Simpson College and Iowa’s agricultural college. He eventually began teaching agriculture at Tuskegee Institute in Alabama after being invited there by Booker T. Washington in 1896. His research centered on introducing soil-enriching crops like peanuts and sweet potatoes to farmers. Carver accepted Christ when he was ten years old and read the Bible constantly. He taught and believed that nature was one way by which God spoke to man. He emphatically believed that his discoveries and his success were from communing with His heavenly Father.images-12

Imagine what God could reveal to you and I when we take the time to listen and commune with Him. The prophet Daniel recorded that while praying, the angel Gabriel came to him. Gabriel told Daniel that he had come, “…to give [him] insight and understanding.” (Daniel 9:22) What could we accomplish with heavenly wisdom and insight? What is the potential? At the very least, let’s start thinking in terms of expectancy. Perhaps we need to position ourselves for the “words” forthcoming and be ready to write them down. There are songs to be sung, papers to be presented, inventions to be created, businesses to begin, books to be written and wisdom to be spoken as we listen and receive from our heavenly Father. I am convinced that George Washington Carver was not the last person on earth to hear from God.

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Encouragement, Leadership, Uncategorized

A Struggle of Leadership

Many persons are under the impression their leaders do not struggle with everyday life temptations as they themselves do. Somehow, they have projected in their minds, that leaders have risen above the ability to miss the mark. Sadly then, these same leaders can begin to think similar thoughts which can eventually lead to a “pedestal” mentality.   Here’s a key for each and every leader out there: to admit that you as a leader struggle is to admit that you are actually human…is to admit that you do not have it all together. I John 1:8 says, “If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.” As a leader, do you walk in any kind of self-deception? Believe me, it’s a fair questions to ask yourself and to expect Holy Spirit to reveal an answer.

images-10Leaders are forgiven persons, but not perfect. You do not need to pretend that your private world is perfect. Recognize your capacity for failure, but also recognize failure is not the problem; it’s what we do with failure. Failure can actually bring you to the end of the performance lie; give yourself permission to fail. Then, allow the failure to launch you into a path of personal healing. Embrace the place you are, while at the same time remembering God is taking you somewhere new in your leadership capacity.

 

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Encouragement, Leadership, Small Groups, Training, Uncategorized

Encountering Risky Business Through the Four P’s

images-6 (Note: I am sending this blog out early due to taking some vacation time next week.) Wanting to follow-up on last weeks post, I thought it appropriate to share four types of risk to steer clear of. I am unsure where some of these originated from, but I have used them for years in attempting to help others in their personal life. I have urged many to stay away from: people of risk; places of risk; possessions of risk; and processes of risk. What do I mean?

Often as a young believer, it is difficult to discern who to hang out with, old friends with bad habits or all new relationships. Initially, it might be advisable to stay away from those persons who are risky to your personal growth and change. Identifying persons of risk can eliminate being talked out of new life patterns. A place of risk is a pretty obvious one. In other words, for now stay clear of those establishments that allowed and promoted your former life-style of sin. Possessions of risk are a bit tougher to discern or even do away with. In Acts chapter 19, it was discovered that many new believers had been involved in sorcery. The new converts made a large bonfire and threw their sorcery scrolls into the fire. They eliminated many possessions of risk. Today this may include books/magazines, music CD’s or even computer games.

Lastly, it is important to consider processes of risk. Process is the connection to our thoughts. For example, prior to becoming a Christian our process of thought when being verbally attacked might have been inordinate anger or running away. Both became familiar and established life patterns, but both of these can be risky due to the fact that we might not be processing truthfully. As the word of God is received and acted upon, our responses will begin to change because our thought processes encounter truth and truth will set us free from former life patterns of risk. Which of the four P’s are you working on?

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Leadership, Small Groups, Training, Uncategorized

It’s a Good Time for the Plane to Break

It always intrigues me how people respond when they hear their flight is being delayed or canceled due to needed maintenance. First there is this huge sigh, then a buzz of talking (mostly to complete strangers about how badly run this particular airline is) and then they head for the gate agent to release their tension and anger. At that point, I really feel bad for the agent who has to take the customers’ entire wrath. My question of relief is, “Do you want the plane to break in the air or on the ground?” Yes, it’s inconvenient, time-consuming, and a huge bother but when that plane gets in the air I want it to stay there. There is actually very little you can do to change the situation, so…what are you telling yourself?images-4

Self-talk is constant, even while we sleep. But, what may not be constant is listening to our self-talk. Stop right now and ask yourself, “What am I thinking at this very moment even as I read this blog?” What we are telling ourselves (our self-talk) is what we will eventually react to. If we tell ourselves that a broken down plane, being late and missing our connection is anxiety producing it will be. But, if we tell ourselves it’s an opportunity to grab a bite to eat, it may even come as a relief. Listening is an acquired skill. People pay people $150.00 per hour to be listened to and quite often feel better. Why? Someone is listening in order to understand them. If you’ll take the time to listen to your self-talk, you’ll discover a lot about yourself. You’ll discover both lies and truths, the latter leading to right action and the other leading to wrong (re)actions. In the future, when a “plane” breaks in your life, stop and listen to your self-talk, you may discover something you didn’t know about yourself.

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Encouragement, Leadership, Prayer

Sitting by the Lake: The Value of Rest

Internally, we know that a church, a ministry, a business cannot be built on one person or personality alone. In 1991, after surveying 1,000 pastors, the Fuller Institute of Church Growth reported the following:

–       50% felt unable to meet the demands of the job, and 84% felt that their training was inadequate

–       70% reported working more than 60 hours per week, and 45% did not take a regular day off

–       53% averaged five to six hours of sleep each night

–       85% spent two or less evenings home per week, yet 73% stated that they had no close intimate relationships beyond their spouse

–       80% believe that ministry negatively affects their family

–       40% reported serious conflict with a parishioner monthly

–       37% confessed an inappropriate sexual behavior with someone in the church

–       50% admitted they had considered leaving the ministry in the last 30 months

ImageWhile those stats seem alarming, Jesus has a prescription for the weary, the burdened. He said, “Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest…and you will find rest for your souls.” (Mt 11:28, 29) Jesus did take time away, time off for reflection, for refocus and for rest. In Matthew thirteen, verse one we are told that He left the house he was staying in and “sat by the lake”. Jesus, not unlike you and me, knew the value and the refreshment of sitting by a body of water. Later in the next chapter, He withdrew by boat privately to a solitary place (V. 13) and again by the end of this same chapter He dismissed His disciples and went up on a mountainside by Himself to pray. When Jesus and His disciples were worn out from ministering He said, “…Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.” (Mark 31b) I love that the Son of God was an example to us in the area of rest and spending time with His Father. Where is your “lake” and in what ways are you resting?

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Children, Encouragement, Leadership, Training

Have You Spoken a Blessing Lately?

I have been reminded recently of the words of blessing that we can speak and receive.  Reading the Old Testament books of Genesis and Exodus lately has been that reminder.  The blessing of God to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob and the blessing of fathers to their children were so present in these two books.  It caused me to think about the fact that “the blessing” might be somewhat missing, dormant or at the least decreased among us as believers today.  The fact that we have been blessed from the many saints before us to the blessings that we can speak into the future is evident in the chapters of these two books.  When God speaks a blessing He does not revoke it with a…”whoops, wrong one.”  When Jacob showed up after hunting his game and desired his father’s blessing it had already been deceitfully stolen and Jacob asked, “Do you have only one blessing, my father?” Because of Joseph, the Egyptian’s were blessed.  Even Potiphar realized blessing from the life of Joseph.  The scripture says, “The blessing of the Lord was on everything Potiphar had, both in the house and in the field.”  In the book of Exodus, a blessing was pronounced on your food and water and freedom from sickness if you will bless the Lord in your worship.  That’s pretty powerful.  After all the many plagues, when Pharaoh finally summoned Moses and Aaron in order to give in and let the Israelites leave Egypt he said, “Take your flocks and herds, as you have said, and go. And also bless me.”  (Ex 12:32) After all the issues with this leader, he has the audacity to ask Moses for a blessing.  Even the resistant and ungodly knew the power of the blessing from the righteous.images

You are a blessing to your family, your local church ministry, your work place and your neighborhood.  You can bless or curse with your words and it will stick.  In obedience to the Lord, we bless and receive blessing. (Dt. 11:26)  You can bless your natural and your spiritual children today.  You can bless others in prayer – praying a blessing forward.  Because you are blessed, when you show up a blessing is present to those around you.  When you lack confidence, know you have been blessed.  When you are feeling insecure or fearful, remind yourself of the blessing of God to you as a son or daughter of God.  When someone curses you or speaks negative about you, return a blessing to them.  Bless those who curse you…  (Luke 6:28)  Our Father loves to bless and so should we as His children.

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