Leadership, Marriage, Postmarital, Premarital

The Ten Most Important Lessons after 37 Years of Marriage

Number 3: Honor

Thirty seven years of marriage can teach you lots of things.  When we spoke our vows to one another, to God and to those who witnessed our wedding, we were young, could not see any sickness ahead or any major bumps in the road.  We went as far as to say that we would honor each other.  Honor, what an interesting word?  How does a 21-year-old comprehend honor?  Romans 12 says to honor one another above yourself.  Selfishly, I couldn’t wait to be married for all of the benefits.  In the Greek, the word for honor is, “temay” and it means to give of your time for another to be more important than you are (not quite the definition of selfishness).

In selfishness, we naturally dishonor in word and deed.  We use “put downs,” joke about our mate, neglect their needs, are lacking in affection, and want to talk rather than listen.  Further, homes that do not honor God and give Him first place will as well lack honor within the marriage relationship (see John 5:23 & 12:26).  Children will not honor their parents when honor is missing within the marriage.  Dishonor comes easily while honor comes with sacrifice of one’s self.  To honor is to serve, to speak life and encouragement.  It is to esteem and to respect.  It is to see the queen in every woman and the king in every man.  Honor focuses on the gifts and strengths and acknowledges them out loud.  Honor defends, believes in and stands guard over one’s life mate.  As you choose to give and show honor, it will change your marriage and your life.

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