Category Archives: Leadership

Encouragement, Leadership, Small Groups, Training, Uncategorized

Encountering Risky Business Through the Four P’s

images-6 (Note: I am sending this blog out early due to taking some vacation time next week.) Wanting to follow-up on last weeks post, I thought it appropriate to share four types of risk to steer clear of. I am unsure where some of these originated from, but I have used them for years in attempting to help others in their personal life. I have urged many to stay away from: people of risk; places of risk; possessions of risk; and processes of risk. What do I mean?

Often as a young believer, it is difficult to discern who to hang out with, old friends with bad habits or all new relationships. Initially, it might be advisable to stay away from those persons who are risky to your personal growth and change. Identifying persons of risk can eliminate being talked out of new life patterns. A place of risk is a pretty obvious one. In other words, for now stay clear of those establishments that allowed and promoted your former life-style of sin. Possessions of risk are a bit tougher to discern or even do away with. In Acts chapter 19, it was discovered that many new believers had been involved in sorcery. The new converts made a large bonfire and threw their sorcery scrolls into the fire. They eliminated many possessions of risk. Today this may include books/magazines, music CD’s or even computer games.

Lastly, it is important to consider processes of risk. Process is the connection to our thoughts. For example, prior to becoming a Christian our process of thought when being verbally attacked might have been inordinate anger or running away. Both became familiar and established life patterns, but both of these can be risky due to the fact that we might not be processing truthfully. As the word of God is received and acted upon, our responses will begin to change because our thought processes encounter truth and truth will set us free from former life patterns of risk. Which of the four P’s are you working on?

Standard
Leadership, Small Groups, Training, Uncategorized

It’s a Good Time for the Plane to Break

It always intrigues me how people respond when they hear their flight is being delayed or canceled due to needed maintenance. First there is this huge sigh, then a buzz of talking (mostly to complete strangers about how badly run this particular airline is) and then they head for the gate agent to release their tension and anger. At that point, I really feel bad for the agent who has to take the customers’ entire wrath. My question of relief is, “Do you want the plane to break in the air or on the ground?” Yes, it’s inconvenient, time-consuming, and a huge bother but when that plane gets in the air I want it to stay there. There is actually very little you can do to change the situation, so…what are you telling yourself?images-4

Self-talk is constant, even while we sleep. But, what may not be constant is listening to our self-talk. Stop right now and ask yourself, “What am I thinking at this very moment even as I read this blog?” What we are telling ourselves (our self-talk) is what we will eventually react to. If we tell ourselves that a broken down plane, being late and missing our connection is anxiety producing it will be. But, if we tell ourselves it’s an opportunity to grab a bite to eat, it may even come as a relief. Listening is an acquired skill. People pay people $150.00 per hour to be listened to and quite often feel better. Why? Someone is listening in order to understand them. If you’ll take the time to listen to your self-talk, you’ll discover a lot about yourself. You’ll discover both lies and truths, the latter leading to right action and the other leading to wrong (re)actions. In the future, when a “plane” breaks in your life, stop and listen to your self-talk, you may discover something you didn’t know about yourself.

Standard
Encouragement, Leadership, Prayer

Sitting by the Lake: The Value of Rest

Internally, we know that a church, a ministry, a business cannot be built on one person or personality alone. In 1991, after surveying 1,000 pastors, the Fuller Institute of Church Growth reported the following:

–       50% felt unable to meet the demands of the job, and 84% felt that their training was inadequate

–       70% reported working more than 60 hours per week, and 45% did not take a regular day off

–       53% averaged five to six hours of sleep each night

–       85% spent two or less evenings home per week, yet 73% stated that they had no close intimate relationships beyond their spouse

–       80% believe that ministry negatively affects their family

–       40% reported serious conflict with a parishioner monthly

–       37% confessed an inappropriate sexual behavior with someone in the church

–       50% admitted they had considered leaving the ministry in the last 30 months

ImageWhile those stats seem alarming, Jesus has a prescription for the weary, the burdened. He said, “Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest…and you will find rest for your souls.” (Mt 11:28, 29) Jesus did take time away, time off for reflection, for refocus and for rest. In Matthew thirteen, verse one we are told that He left the house he was staying in and “sat by the lake”. Jesus, not unlike you and me, knew the value and the refreshment of sitting by a body of water. Later in the next chapter, He withdrew by boat privately to a solitary place (V. 13) and again by the end of this same chapter He dismissed His disciples and went up on a mountainside by Himself to pray. When Jesus and His disciples were worn out from ministering He said, “…Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.” (Mark 31b) I love that the Son of God was an example to us in the area of rest and spending time with His Father. Where is your “lake” and in what ways are you resting?

Standard
Children, Encouragement, Leadership, Training

Have You Spoken a Blessing Lately?

I have been reminded recently of the words of blessing that we can speak and receive.  Reading the Old Testament books of Genesis and Exodus lately has been that reminder.  The blessing of God to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob and the blessing of fathers to their children were so present in these two books.  It caused me to think about the fact that “the blessing” might be somewhat missing, dormant or at the least decreased among us as believers today.  The fact that we have been blessed from the many saints before us to the blessings that we can speak into the future is evident in the chapters of these two books.  When God speaks a blessing He does not revoke it with a…”whoops, wrong one.”  When Jacob showed up after hunting his game and desired his father’s blessing it had already been deceitfully stolen and Jacob asked, “Do you have only one blessing, my father?” Because of Joseph, the Egyptian’s were blessed.  Even Potiphar realized blessing from the life of Joseph.  The scripture says, “The blessing of the Lord was on everything Potiphar had, both in the house and in the field.”  In the book of Exodus, a blessing was pronounced on your food and water and freedom from sickness if you will bless the Lord in your worship.  That’s pretty powerful.  After all the many plagues, when Pharaoh finally summoned Moses and Aaron in order to give in and let the Israelites leave Egypt he said, “Take your flocks and herds, as you have said, and go. And also bless me.”  (Ex 12:32) After all the issues with this leader, he has the audacity to ask Moses for a blessing.  Even the resistant and ungodly knew the power of the blessing from the righteous.images

You are a blessing to your family, your local church ministry, your work place and your neighborhood.  You can bless or curse with your words and it will stick.  In obedience to the Lord, we bless and receive blessing. (Dt. 11:26)  You can bless your natural and your spiritual children today.  You can bless others in prayer – praying a blessing forward.  Because you are blessed, when you show up a blessing is present to those around you.  When you lack confidence, know you have been blessed.  When you are feeling insecure or fearful, remind yourself of the blessing of God to you as a son or daughter of God.  When someone curses you or speaks negative about you, return a blessing to them.  Bless those who curse you…  (Luke 6:28)  Our Father loves to bless and so should we as His children.

Standard
Encouragement, Leadership, Small Groups

You’re not Losing Your Hair, Your Head is Growing Bigger

A friend of mine recently told me that after asking his physician about his hair loss problem the doctor responded with, “You’re not losing your hair, you’re gaining weight and your head is bigger.”   My friend’s response was to laugh, but if that were me, I would have been upset with the doctor for putting it so, well…bluntly. I wondered about myself, do I want the truth or do I desire a sugar-coated, let-me-down-easy and convenient near truth? Perhaps a combination of the two would be preferable – you know, a speaking close to the truth in love, because you LOVE me.images

Someone else recently shared with me they are “telling it like it is” and that sometimes “the truth hurts.” My response was, “Yea, right, unless it’s you on the receiving end of that not so objective ‘truth.’ ” God bless you for desiring to be truthful, but are you capable of handling it when it comes your way? For me, when that truth comes, all too often, I am thinking of my defensive response rather than listening intently. I am then coming up with why this person is wrong in my mind or making a personal judgment of them in order to cancel out what they are saying. Still, at other times, my rebuttal is to sight all the times of operating in just the opposite way of what they are critiquing. Honestly, when you’re thinking about your response you stop listening.

 If you ignore criticism, you will end in poverty and disgrace; if you accept criticism, you will be honored. If you listen to constructive criticism, you will be at home among the wise. Valid criticism is as treasured by the one who heeds it… In the end, people appreciate frankness more than flattery. (Proverbs 13:18; 15;31 25;12; 28;23 NLT)

Standard
Encouragement, Leadership, Small Groups, Training, Uncategorized

Accountability? We have no Idea

United Airlines was flying me from Chicago to Harrisburg, PA a few weeks ago when I struck up a conversation with the “kid” seated beside me. I found that he was pretty special. He can shoot a gun extremely accurately. I suppose a lot of people can do that, but this 20-year-old has been on the USA Olympic Team since he was 17. He shoots for the International Shooting Sport Federation and gets to participate in his passion all over the world. He told me, “I’m not getting rich but I sure am enjoying what I’m doing in my life right now.” He let me know that there’s only one draw back: accountability. Now that intrigued me as a leader. “Accountability, what ever do you mean?” I asked. He went on to describe accountability like I have never heard of before.

imagesHe responded, “I have to provide every detail of my life and fill out form after form electronically.” “Like what for instance?” I asked. “Well, where I am at; what I am doing; where I am going; what I am eating; my health; my practice schedule; any medication I am taking; how much I’m sleeping; basically, my whole life is an open book,” he revealed. I asked him who required such a rigorous report and he told me the international Olympic federation. “Now that’s some intrusive accountability,” I said in agreement. It caused me to think about my level of accountability to those who oversee me and to my wife. It, as well, provoked some thoughts about how accountable I am to my Lord like, “So, how accountable am I, or even better, how accountable am I willing to be?” Check out these verses from the New Living Translation:

Everything is naked and exposed before his eyes, and he is the one to whom we are accountable. Obey your spiritual leaders, and do what they say. Their work is to watch over your souls, and they are accountable to God. Give them reason to do this with joy and not with sorrow. That would certainly not be for your benefit. (Hebrews 4:13; 13:17)

Standard
Encouragement, Leadership

When God Speaks, Don’t Laugh

It is recorded in scripture that Abraham and Sarah were barren. Even though God told Abraham his offspring would be as numerous as the sand on the seashore, they were now well past child-bearing age. Abraham was 99 years old when the Lord told him that his wife would become pregnant. His reaction? First Abraham fell over, then he laughed to himself and then he questioned God by asking, “Will a son be born to a man a hundred years old?” His second question was, “Will Sarah bear a child at the age of ninety?” I am pretty sure that I would have had the same questions along with the out loud laughter piece once I picked myself up off the floor.

pregnant20old20lady20elderly20woman20having20babyNot only was God creating outside of Abraham’s belief system, He was operating outside of natural/biological laws. As Abraham and his elderly bride are still in shock, three unexpected visitors show up in their front yard. Sarah, inside the tent, found herself listening intently to the conversation taking place outside the tent. What she hears is, well… shocking to her and as the news of her impending pregnancy is revealed, she laughs to herself. Sarah’s silent question is, “Will I really have a child now that I am old?” Or, perhaps more believable, her internal questioning went something like this, “Me? Pregnant” Are you kidding?” The Lord heard her laugh and then spoke something beyond their theology, beyond their life experience and beyond their personal comprehension and faith. It was a question, but not really a question. It was that God is about to rock your world to the core statement: “Is anything too hard for the Lord?” (Genesis 17/18)

I am not sure what you’re dealing with today, but one thing I am sure of: nothing is too difficult for your God and that’s not a laughing matter.

Standard
Leadership, Prayer, Small Groups, Training

Matching Our Theology with Our Experience

Which is correct: Do we match our theology to our life experience or do we match our life experience to our theology? What do I mean? Let’s say you believe in miraculous healing.  As well, your theology backs up your belief in miraculous healing.  Then you go on to act upon that belief and theology by praying for the sick. You pray with all the gusto and faith you can possibly muster.  You do this repeatedly for a period of several years.  Over that same period no one is healed, not even a headache disappears miraculously.  You are left with disappointment after disappointment and not one single testimony of healing.  Now what do you do?

You have options. You can change your theology to one that says God no longer heals the sick.  You can get angry with God and declare He no longer hears your prayers and you refuse to be embarrassed by such prayers any longer. You can believe that you simply do not have the “gift of healing.”  Or you can back off, be discouraged and give up praying for those who need a miracle. In my lifetime, I have found myself somewhere within this list – mainly discouragement.  Today, because of the lack of experiencing miraculous healing, whole denominations are built on the belief that God no longer heals. It is how they justify their experience or lack thereof.  It’s dangerous to match your theology with your experience because God may have a different answer.  We’ll look at some of those answers next week.

Standard
Encouragement, Leadership, Small Groups

Failure, the Pathway to Success

Thomas Watson, the founder of IBM once said, “The way to succeed is to double your failure rate.”  It is said that Thomas Edison worked on 10,000 different experiments to find the right filament for the light bulb.  He started in early 1878 and on October 21, 1879, almost two years later the first incandescent light bulb was born.  Edison understood that failure was the pathway to success. Edison believed that he needed to discover what did not work in order to get closer to what did work.  His theory believed in failure as a part of the process to success. For some reason we tend to see failure as a failing – I do not believe we should – mainly because I do not believe God does.  (Why do I believe this?  Because nowhere in His word did He hide the failures of His children.)

I like what Winston Churchill once said, “Success is going from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.”  And Solomon said it this way, “…for though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again.”  (Proverbs 24:16a)  How does this apply to you and me as leaders today?  We can project ourselves as a leader, one who is the ideal.  Without always realizing it, we can become polished versions of the super Christian, the super pastor, or the super marketplace leader.  We then need to project always being happy, always being well-adjusted, always being in faith, always overcoming every temptation or failure.  We must feverishly protect our fragile esteem and our image of leader at all cost.  Whether trying it or not, owning up to it or not we are saying, “be perfect like me, have my faith – and if I am doing it, certainly I can expect you to.”  Take a deep breath and enjoy today along with the mistakes made by yourself and those around you.  Allow them to be lessons learned toward success.

 

Standard
Encouragement, Leadership, Marriage, Singles

Doing a One Eighty at Thirty Seven Thousand Feet

Last week I was in the middle of flying out of the country to spend time with several churches that I have the privilege of serving.  We were at 37,000 feet over the Atlantic and almost half way to our destination, having left Charlotte, NC two hours earlier, when the pilot came on the intercom and announced that we would be returning to the states – Miami, in fact.  None of the passengers, including myself, had realized that the plane had already completed its 180-degree turn around and was headed northwest rather than southeast.  This huge plane, a Boeing 757, with every available seat filled to capacity with mostly tourists completely changed directions and no one knew any different.

I got to thinking about that…  Could we be experiencing a 180-degree turn in our marriage and never have a clue?  Could we as believers experience a 180-degree turn in our devotional life or even our faith and not realize it?  Could our nation be experiencing a 180-degree turn away from a biblical truth and we do not know the Word of God well enough to realize what’s happening right before our eyes?  The scriptures tell us that the enemy of our souls…”masquerades as an angel of light.”  He can make something look good or enticing when in fact it is 180 degrees the opposite of the will of God.  Are you headed in the godly direction that you thought you were in every area of life?  “Lord, reveal to each of us the direction of our heart and soul.”

Standard