I would love to create some scientific measurement tool to give to couples so they could discover how married they actually are. You say, “How married they are; whatever does that mean?” It means how connected, unified, truthful, in agreement and simply stated: how one they are. Here’s how I see this marriage measurement tool working…
There would be a series of questions where the couple would either gain percentage points or they would lose percentage points depending upon their responses. At the end, the percentage that remains would be how married they are. So, for example:
Do you have separate bank accounts? Yes -3% No +3%
Are you free to look through one another’s mail/email? Yes +4% No -4%
Do you pray together? Yes +9% No -9%
Do you share PIN numbers? Yes +5% No -5%
Do you regularly keep secrets from your spouse? Yes -7% No +7%
Do you always tell your spouse the truth? Yes +8% No -8%
You get the idea. In the end, we would discover just how married we desire to be. Author Gary Thomas asks, “Are we going be 60 percent married or 90 percent…or, are we committed to…100 percent?”