Last week we considered 13 ways a wife felt secure within her marriage and I thought it best to not leave the men out of this one. So, here are 15 ways a man can feel secure within his marriage as shared by a husband.
- She puts her relationship with God first in her life.
- She has a daily devotional time in order to listen to her heavenly Father.
- She cares about herself physically and emotionally and the image she reflects.
- She loves, cares for and sacrifices for her children unselfishly.
- She prioritizes caring for her husband in big and small ways.
- She cares for her home, keeping it neat and in order. There is no confusion around her.
- She holds her husband’s hand and is affectionate even in a long-term marriage relationship.
- She is not trying to change her husband, but accepts him as he is.
- She brings a cold drink to her husband when he is working outside in the heat.
- She pray’s with and for her husband daily.
- She blesses and encourages her husband’s hobbies.
- She is her husband’s best friend.
- She quickly forgives.
- She has eyes and emotions for her husband only and enjoys a healthy sex life with him.
- She loves her husband unconditionally and tells him daily.
Go on a date and ask your husband what helps him to feel secure in your marriage relationship. You may be surprised by what you hear.
aries concerning relationship with the opposite sex.
knees and in health…” Remember that statement? Does anyone foresee sickness? They’re just words of tradition, right? Actually they are words spoken as a promise, a vow. But quite honestly, we were young and the young do not get sick or have a frame of reference for a long-term illness. Some of those spoken vows said in our 20’s or 30’s are not tested for another thirty or forty years. When sickness comes, the depth of our love and commitment will be examined.
aring for the future by growing your marital oneness today, this month, this year?
Determine today to grow old together, because there is only one thing that is greater than young love in a marital relationship and that’s old love.
“In order for me to feel good about me, I need to know that you feel good about me.”
For the first two questions the answer is: reconciliation. To reconcile means to go from an unacceptable state to an acceptable state. Christ has done that work by first accepting us. (Romans 15:7)
The next two have an answer as well: justification. Before my performance, I am justified. To be justified means that I am forgiven of my sin; I am free from my shame and my guilt and I am in right standing with God. Again, not because of what I have done or can do, but because of what Christ has done. (Romans 3:21-28; 5:1; II Corinthians 5:21)
We all deserve punishment, however Christ took that punishment for our past, present and future sin upon Himself and that’s called: propitiation. Propitiation is when God placed His Son upon the cross for us to make atonement forever. (I John 4:9, 10, 18)
Lastly, I can change. I am not up for a vote. The answer to change is: regeneration. Robert McGee once said that who you think you should be is less than who you already are. To be regenerated is to become a new creation. To become born again is to get to start over and participate in His divine nature. (II Corinthians 5:17)
This is a blog about “church,” so-to-speak, but maybe we miss the mark a bit if we don’t keep putting the focus back on the One who precedes the church and everything else. The church is, no doubt, meant to be a much more radical movement than we have understood it to be. How much more important is it for us to see that Jesus, the head of the church, is a far more radical man/God than we can even begin to understand. He is the One we, His church, are designed to imitate. Perhaps if we get Jesus right, and our imitation of Him in keeping with who He is, we will naturally get church right.
In I Corinthians 7:5 the Apostle Paul tells us that abstinence within marriage will distract us from a healthy prayer life as a couple. Many read this verse to mean that having sex as a married couple will actually distract us from prayer, but I believe just the opposite is true. Author Gary Thomas says it this way, “Use marriage the way God intended it. Meet your sexual needs by making love to your spouse. Then your mind and soul will be more open to prayer.”
How common is it to attempt to protect yourself from pain and hurt? It seems to be a natural human reaction to back away from something that we interpret as painful or possibly painful in the future. It can block us from making healthy decisions for today and tomorrow. Most of us have an aversion to emotional pain, but avoidance may not be the best method for personal growth. As you and I look back over our lives, we often discover that it is the most painful or emotionally difficult times in our past in which we grew the most. And, to avoid these times or to run from them could actually stunt our personal growth.
Here in the USA, the military draft ended at the end of the Vietnam War. In some nations around the world, there is a required season of serving in the military for young men and women. I imagine for most it’s not a bad deal, i.e., education, learning discipline, obeying authority and good physical health. I enjoyed much of the process of “becoming a man” in the US military. One of my favorite memories was leading many of the lonely, homesick men into a relationship with Jesus. Evangelism opportunities were everywhere. 
Our younger son, following graduation from college, spent seven years traveling the USA in a rock band, recording two albums in Nashville, getting married, having a son himself all the while also working at a local law firm, has recently graduated from Weidner Law School as valedictorian. He has worked so hard and we are so proud of him as any parent would be. But there’s more to the story and it is this ‘more’ part that causes us to be especially proud – his speech delivered at graduation before his classmates, his professors, guest speakers and the many family members gathered there that day.
