There is a truth revealed concerning child rearing in I Samuel chapter eight in the Old Testament. Samuel was growing quite old so he appointed his sons as judges over Israel. “But his sons did not walk in his ways. They turned aside after dishonest gain and accepted bribes and perverted justice.” (I Samuel 8:3) It was after this that Israel desired a king rather than being ruled by a judge.
So often blame is placed upon Samuel for how his sons carried out their new-found power. Had Samuel failed as a father? The scripture does not indicate that he did. Samuel’s sons made their own choice and Samuel was not faulted for those choices.
I have seen difficult children come from great families and great children come from difficult families. We like to think there is a guarantee, but at the same time, I have never met a parent with adult children that said there is a guarantee our children will walk as we’ve trained them to.
Our children, given the truth of God’s word, still live with freedom of choice and free will. Can we as parents be good enough parents that somehow God is beholden to, indebted to go against their own will? As well, the opposite is also true. We, as parents can mess up and yet our Father is generously compassionate and merciful beyond anything deserved.
If your children are not walking as you expected then pray, ask God and do not walk in condemnation and failure. Rather, walk in faith.
Recently my wife and I had the privilege of spending a weekend with some young married couples on a retreat. Amidst our time together, we desired to ask them a question. That question went something like this: If you were given the chance to share with a younger couple just entering into marriage, what advice would you pass on to them? What follows is some of the excellent input we were given.
Marriage, being God’s design from the beginning, is an amazingly creative design. Every time I am on an airplane sitting shoulder to shoulder with a stranger, I wish it were my wife. It’s just so odd to be that physically close to someone you do not know and have never met. Marriage is as close and intimate as an earthly relationship can become. And the fact of the matter is, over time, it becomes even closer.
Whenever we have a first-time visitor to our home, given the chance, we tell them a story. I’ll tell you that story too.
With the commitment of a very dear friend, he and I built that house from foundation up, nailing every stud, pulling every wire, plumbing and painting. Now almost 32 years ago, we still tell the story. We can’t stop telling the story because it’s the house that God built.
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him.
On a recent prayer time away from my office, I carried John Wesley’s 21 accountability questions with me. I have gone through these numerous times and really enjoy doing so. I thought that if you were not familiar with them, you just might like to consider a look as well. On that note, here they are:
In 2018 I was able to enjoy several children’s dedication services. One was my grandson. That was special.
Benjamin’s faith followed him in all he set out to accomplish. Perhaps it was his father’s dedicating him to the service of the Lord that helped to hold him to that relationship. With the many trials and tribulations, losses and shattered dreams he encountered, late in the book he wrote, “I at present think that whoever attempts this aright, and is well qualified, can not fail of pleasing God, and of meeting with success.”
I was speaking with a friend recently about a specific governmental department that I obviously did not have a good word for. Later in a text message, I apologized for my negative expressions. And here’s the reason for my apology: Holy Spirit.
Three wise men traveled quite a distance to see the Christ child. There is a bit of debate about the distance they traveled, as well as the time it took to travel those miles. Some Bible scholars say He was a toddler and some say He was still an infant when they arrived in Bethlehem.
Before we said, “I do” we diligently worked at not having or experiencing differences with one another, at least not out loud. We wanted to be argument free and not allow anything to inhibit our communication. But not long after saying “I do,” for many of us that changed. We trusted our marriage vows to hold us together while experiencing differences, even when they became heated. What changed?
Steve Prokopchak 